The Loss of Childhood Innocence

Yesterday, my 8 year old son asked me what Fortnite is and why all his friends are “obsessed” with it. I explained it was a video game. We talked a little about what his friends were saying about it and how they were behaving. Then he asked me, “why do their parents let them play games about killing people?” My initial reaction and gut response was not a fair one so I kept it to myself and told him we could talk about it later. I had to think about it because honestly, I don’t understand it either.

I have an incredible amount of stories about children who have been exposed to violent and disturbing media at a young age and how it has affected them. My sister and I babysat two children who were 3 and terrified to go near a storm drain because that’s where “Periwinkle” (aka Pennywise) lived. Years later, when the remake of “It” came out a 6 year old boy came up behind my son and pretended to stab him in the back. He said, “I’m Pennywise and now you’re dead!” then laughed and ran off. My son was upset and asked me what had just happened and who was Pennywise. When I taught 6th grade, my students told me how their parents took them to see horror movies at the theater and how many they have watched at home. They told me how they stayed up all night playing video games like Fortnite and Grand Theft Auto, so they couldn’t possible be alert enough to learn math.

That night at bedtime, I told my son the truth; I don’t know why parents let their children play violent video games. I don’t know why they allow them to watch violent and disturbing movies either. What I do know is that by doing these things we are robbing our children of their innocence. By exposing our children to these types of games and media we are taking away the good and wholesomeness that we loved about our children when they were babies and toddlers and we replace it with negative things our children should never have think about and process at 5, 6, 7, or even 8.

Why do we want to make our children fearful of being murdered? Things that most adult should never have to witness, we are showing our children. Maybe as an adult you can reason that you know “it’s not real” (which still doesn’t mean it doesn’t affect you). But children have a much harder time understanding and discerning what is real and what isn’t. Honestly, I don’t watch horror movies because of how they make me feel. I hate that someone even thought up the premise of the movie (disturbing). I hate how upset it makes me feel. I hate that I can’t get the images out of my head for at least a week afterwards if not longer. There is NO WAY I am putting all of that on my child. As a parent I want my child to feel safe, calm and have good thoughts, not fearful, upset, paranoid and haunted by images of blood, gore, and people doing horrible, unimaginable things to other people.

Then there are the video games where we encourage our children to kill people. Again, children don’t understand fully what is real and what isn’t. My child thinks that they can do something just because they say they can. For example, my son said, “I can swim.” I reminded him that he could not swim and to stay away from the pool. He started to spout off how he watched a movie where a kid was swimming so he was sure he could do it too. When we got into the pool I said, “okay, swim.” Guess who sunk. Now I knew this would happen and the child’s hair didn’t even get wet I scoped him up so fast as he started going under. He then admitted that maybe he can’t swim just by watching a movie. My daughter swears she can do gymnastics for the same reason. She is 5 and although it is cute to watch her try, she is in no way doing any sort of gymnastics. The point is, you give a kid a shooting game and they think they know how to use a gun. And honestly, if said kid gets their hands on a real gun they are much more likely to play with it, try it, point it at a person or themselves, and heaven forbid shoot someone. There are studies that have shown that children who have watched violent behavior mimic that behavior.

My whole point to this little rant of mine is this question: Why are we subjecting our children to violence and disturbing media? Why do we want to take away their innocence and throw them into an upsetting world of violence, fear and negativity? How is anyone benefiting from this? As a parent, I just don’t understand it and I am heartbroken about it.